I love Dave Barry. Thanks to Bat for sending me this link! If you’ve ever lived in the area, you know the Golden Glades is NOT somewhere you want to have to drive through. It is the most fucked up link of highway I’ve seen anywhere in the country……add to that the horrifically bad Florida drivers……and you’ve got disaster.

Put down your drink and listen up, South Florida, because it is time to talk Super Bowl security.

It is a known fact that the Super Bowl is a major target for terrorism. The terrorists HATE the Super Bowl, because (a) it is a symbol of corrupt Western decadence, and (b) the terrorists lost a giant bet in 2004 when the Patriots failed to cover the spread.

So we have every reason to believe the terrorists will try to attack this Super Bowl. In fact, it can now be revealed that they have ALREADY MADE ONE ATTEMPT.

Yes. On Wednesday, a group of terrorists flew into Miami International Airport Construction Zone, carrying a large quantity of powerful explosives, which they were able to get onto their plane because they put them in clear, one-quart, zip-top plastic bags, in accordance with Transportation Safety Administration rules.

“These guys really knew what they were doing,” a TSA spokesperson said. “They also removed their shoes.”

The terrorists then rented a car and were headed toward Originally Joe Robbie Stadium when they made a fatal mistake: They tried to get through the Golden Glades Interchange.

“They never had a chance,” a police source said. “We picked them up in Atlanta.”

Full article at the Washington Post